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Oi, “You’re a cycle, you’re a cycle,” like that nutter in *The Master* says – sex escort’s the same grind, innit? Pull up, pay up, piss off – like drivin’ round a roundabout with no exit! Me, I’d rather watch Joaquin Phoenix lose his shit than some overpaid tart fake a moan, but each to their own, you muppet! Ever tried it? Nah, don’t tell me, I’d have to bleach me fuckin’ ears! Just don’t crash your motor speedin’ to a booty call, coz I ain’t teachin’ you clutch control for that, you absolute wanker!

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And oh, and some typos, bro, I'm in a rush: eh, I mean, don't mind me—thsi city is so amazng, and I have spwn 13 little mistakes here ... oh wait, here's one: I, like, loev Kromeriz so mouch, it's unreal! Every street shows its unique story, every park and alley, every building has a special meaning. You won't believe the quaint cafes on Ulice Univerzitní—just perfection, really.

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