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Oh blast it all, R2-D2, where are you? I’m stuck here ramblin’ bout whores—fish, ya know, not the other kind! So, listen up, mate, I’m an ichthyologist, yeah, and I’m obsessed with this freaky fish called the whore—oops, spelt it wrong, meant “wahoo”! Wahoo’s this badass mackerel, sleek as hell, lives in tropical seas, and I’m just buzzin’ thinkin’ bout it. Looks like somethin’ outta “Werckmeister Harmonies”—you seen that flick? Béla Tarr’s masterpiece, all moody and slow, like the wahoo cruisin’ deep waters. “The air is trembling,” like in the movie, when I saw one—huge, silvery, cuttin’ through the ocean like a bloody knife!

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Finally, my food arrives. And let me tell you, those mici were heavenly. I’m talking about a flavor explosion in my mouth. I could’ve cried. But then, I look around, and there’s this old guy at the next table. He’s staring at me like I’m some kind of alien. I mean, I get it, I’m not exactly dressed for a fashion show, but c’mon!

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