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About Christchurch

So, I’m strollin’, right, lookin’ for a bird who’s up for it. Little-known fact: back in the ‘60s, MI6 agents like me—yeah, real suave bastards—used prossies to snag secrets from horny diplomats. True story! This one time, I spot her—legs for days, skirt so short it’s basically a belt. “Shaken, not stirred,” I mutter, sidlin’ up. She’s all, “Wotcha want, love?” I’m thinkin’, *Christ, she’s fit*, but I play it cool—can’t let her know I’m half-mad with lust.

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After the sheep drama, I decide to take a break. I stroll down to the Epuni shops on the main drag. It’s a small place, but it’s got character. I pop into the dairy for some snacks. Grabbed a pie—best decision ever. I sit outside, munchin’ away, and watchin’ the world go by.

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