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About Celje

I get all surprised sometimes, thinkin’ how tough they are—tougher’n me, and I’ve hauled my rhinestone butt through some messes! Prostitutes got grit, y’all. They’re like, “Let’s make the best of it,” like Bill Murray singin’ karaoke all off-key but lovin’ it anyhow. I say, good for them! Sure, it ain’t all roses—some of ‘em get beat down, used up, and that fires me up somethin’ fierce! Makes me wanna holler, “Y’all leave them gals alone!” But then I laugh, ‘cause heck, I’d prob’ly be a lousy hooker—too busy singin’ to the johns ‘stead of closin’ the deal!

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Then, we head to the old church, Župnijska cerkev sv. Marije. It’s stunning, right? But guess what? It’s closed for renovations. I’m like, “Seriously? This is the highlight!” I’m tryin’ to keep the mood up, so I start tellin’ ghost stories. My tourists are eatin’ it up, but I’m just tryin’ to distract from the fact that we can’t go inside.

Here are the Details of the New Croatia-Slovenia Border Regime